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Struggling with Singleness


By Marilyn Pritchard

Are you living your best life now? Or are you waiting around for “the right one” so you can begin your life after getting married?

As you were growing up, you may have gotten the message, both from within the church and without, that you’re not “complete” until you’re married. You may even recall the famous line from the 1997 movie “Jerry Maguire,” when Tom Cruise’s character professes his love for his wife with the famous line, “You complete me!” Unfortunately, the church has often been complicit in making single Christians feel “incomplete.” 

But nothing could be further from the truth. God created each of us, male and female, in His image. He has given each of us spiritual gifts to be used in His service. And He can use us to fulfill His purposes whether we are single, married, widowed or divorced.

Remember Paul’s words, that “each person should live as a believer in whatever situation the Lord has assigned to them, just as God has called them” (1 Cor. 7:17). That doesn’t mean God won’t call you to marriage in the future, but wherever you find yourself right now is where you should “live as a believer.”

There are advantages to singleness in serving the Lord. Paul continues in 1 Cor. 7 to say that “those who marry will face many troubles in this life” (vs. 28) and “a married woman is concerned about the affairs of this world” (vs. 34b), whereas an unmarried woman “is concerned about the Lord’s affairs: Her aim is to be devoted to the Lord in both body and spirit” (vs. 34a).

In this season of your life, you may be able to explore full-time mission work; you may be able to move across the country or across the world for a job or to care for a loved one; you may be able to devote time and resources to ministries when, if you were married, that time and resources would need to be used for other things. 

If you are struggling with singleness, I would like to challenge you to spend some time in prayer, asking God how He would have you invest in His kingdom. Whether this is a short season in your life or it becomes a lifetime calling, God can use you. And remember, God has given you everything you need to be “complete, lacking in nothing” (2 Tim. 3:17, ESV).


We at Just Between Us (JBU) want you to know that you’re not alone in your struggle. We’ve compiled several articles here on singleness that might help. Look through them, then take some time with the Lord; journal your thoughts and prayers; spill your heart out to Him. He knows you better than anyone else, and He has only your best interests at heart (Jer. 29:11). 



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