Are You a Worry Wart?

Q.

I have always been a worrier. I worry about my family’s safety, health, and finances. It seems like the more I pray, the more I worry. How can I overcome the worry syndrome?

Worry is a chronic problem for many believers. We worry because we believe three basic lies about worrying. These lies will prevent us from being able to trust God and relax in our faith.

Lie #1: Worry is a sign of love.

Can you remember one or both of your parents saying, “Of course I worry! I love you.”  Some of us have been taught that worry and love go together. We want family and friends to know we love them, so we worry. However, love and worry are not synonymous. Love is based in truth and worry is based in the lie that God is not sufficient. Actually, when we worry, we are showering our loved ones with fear.

To break the cycle, simply say, “I love you and I am praying for you.” Practice passing down love and faith instead of worry and fear.

Lie #2: Worry gets results.

One woman said, “There is nothing I can do about my circumstances, but I can worry.” Yes, she was doing something, but her worrying was worthless.

Once I was waiting for a friend to get out of surgery. As I sat in the waiting room, I began to worry. I realized that everyone in the room was probably having the same struggle, so I began a conversation with a woman next to me. Sure enough, she was worrying too. I began to speak encouraging words to her while we waited. When I encouraged her, I encouraged myself. When you find yourself feeling helpless, find someone whose needs are obvious and begin to help them. God will be working in your life while you are helping somebody else. He will not abandon you if you abandon your fears.

Lie #3: Worrying about small problems will make big ones disappear.

I have a friend named Janice who has long-term marriage problems. I can always tell when the problems are intensifying because instead of talking about her marriage, she begins to worry about her weight. If she begins to lose weight, she worries about her yard or her children…and on and on. As long as she distracts herself from her greatest fear with other worries, her marriage problems continue to escalate. Trading worries may appear to give relief, but it’s self-defeating.

To break this lie, face your basic concern directly. Name it. Take it to the Lord. Ask Him to bring you into a state of absolute surrender regarding your circumstances. Surrender is the bottom line to deliverance from fear. Ask a friend to pray with you and to help you discern God’s leading. Don’t continue to trade one worry for another.

I have found that one of the most effective ways to escape worry is through meditating on 1 Pet. 5:6-7. It says, “Therefore humble yourselves (lower yourselves in your own estimation) under the mighty hand of God, that in due time He may exalt you, casting the whole of your care (all your anxieties, all your worries, all your concerns, once and for all) on Him, for He cares for you affectionately and cares about you watchfully” (Amplified Bible).    

When I find myself stuck in a worry pattern, I make a worry box. I get a strong cardboard or metal box and I write down my worries, followed by my prayers, under girding them with Scripture. I read them out loud, put them in the box, take a ribbon and tie the box with many knots. I put the box in a place where I will see it often. This exercise provides me with a visual for casting my cares on the Lord.

If I decide that I must worry, I promise myself that I will untie every knot, open the box, and take out all of my worries. I sit and worry for at least twenty minutes. That dismal process usually puts me in such a state of angst that I am ready to reload my box and cast my cares on Jesus again. This is my freedom ritual; an external action that helps to clarify an internal transaction. If you are tired of being a worrier, this ritual will help you stay free of fear.

~ By Lynda D. Elliott