Loving Your Spouse
By Kathy Berka
Over the years of my marriage, I’ve seen how God will allow certain circumstances – such as busy schedules, caring for children, ministry demands, or stretched finances – to challenge me to find new methods of communicating love to my husband. I’m certainly no expert on how to love a husband, but some of these circumstances have motivated me to mentally walk through my husband’s day and look for new ways to say, “I love you.”
At times, a lack of energy, creativity, or courage keeps us from demonstrating our love to our husbands. It’s even harder if we didn’t see love demonstrated in the marriages we were exposed to as children. Yet, most of us really want to communicate our love, and it’s what Christ commands us to do, for He knows that the small “I love you’s” help build passionate, pleasing, and permanent marriages. So try some of the ideas I’ve listed below! No matter how you say it, just don’t forget to say it…”I love you!”
- Walk him to the car in the morning to kiss him good-bye.
- Bring a picnic to his office (be sure his schedule permits).
- Bake his favorite dinner or dessert.
- Have breakfast in bed with him.
- Leave “love messages” in his car, his briefcase, his Bible, or I his underwear drawer.
- Wait for him on the porch. Comment on how great he makes that suit and/or shirt look. Or, tell him how much you love having a handsome man come home to you each night.
- Make coupon books good for back rubs, specials meals, sports events, etc.
- Send a rose and note in his briefcase (Men like flowers, too).
- Kidnap him from work for an hour or two at home, without your children.
- Offer to wash his hair or give him a shave and facial.
- Give him a birthday party or a “we love you!” party.
- Buy him something sexy (robe, underwear).
- Go to his sports events, root for him and woo over him.
- Participate in sports or exercise together.
- Take a walk in the rain under one umbrella; tell him how protected he makes you feel.
- Compliment him often, especially in front of your children.
- Gift wrap his favorite snack bar and put it in his briefcase.
- Wake him with a kiss.
- Learn as much as you can about his work. Ask about it and be interested in it.
- Allow him breathing room for hobbies, friends, sports.
- Prepare his favorite midnight snack after a late evening of work or meetings.
- If you’re out, bring home a treat (ice cream, a magazine, etc.).
- Have a Hero dinner when he accomplishes one of his goals (sales, weight, exercise, finished project).
- Let him know you want to please him (once in a while, ask, “What can I do to make you happier?”).
- Put a note in his lunch thanking him for “last night.”
- Men love a good fight – have a water gun attack (be sure to have a spare hidden somewhere).
- On one of his late work nights leave a candle burning and a note for him.
- Dress in an outfit he likes and plan a late dinner just for the two of you!
- Hug him in an elevator or while going up the escalator.
- Every so often, out of the blue, give him a passionate kiss.
- Have his favorite music on when he comes home.
- Plan a late night “encounter” at his office – bring wine, cheese, blankets, etc.
- Play his favorite card or board game.
- If he’s “turning in” late put an inviting sign on the bedroom door like, “Please disturb!”.
- Ask for his prayer requests and pray for him!