In Moments of Weakness

The continuous headlines about fearless females, superhero moms, and mighty girls are inspiring. I consider myself a strong woman. I am proud of my abilities to overcome challenges with courage, skill, and power. However, in the past few months I've started to question my strength. Most days my coping skills hold strong and I sustain my burdens high in the air. However, there are times when no amount of pep talk, healthy habit, or psychological training offer the strength I need. My muscles buckle and the weights crash down leaving me stunned and weak. 

“But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness" (2 Cor. 12:9 NIV).

I know God uses the weak. I've read example after example in His Word. I listen to the sermons and am motivated to be His hands and feet, but I would like Him to reveal His power through the abilities He has given me—the ones I'm “proud of”—not the ones I’m lacking in.

"Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me" (2 Cor. 12:9)

I don't want to relate to the worship songs that name my fears, reveal my failings, and cry out about my weaknesses. But denying them with an "I can do it" script has brought me to a place of exhaustion. 

I'm starting to see that this “strong woman” role is hindering me from receiving the greatest dose of courage, skill, and power possible. The Bible tells me God is more powerful and mighty than I can even imagine. Those worship songs about needing help aren't meant to be whiny; they reflect a humble heart of one who has recognized His greatness. God did not make me to be an independently strong woman, nor did He make me to be His hands and feet. God made me to bring glory to His name (Isaiah 43:7). 

I’m beginning to see He allows His people to be brought to weakness so we can clearly see our choices. We can attempt to hold our burdens high while we make headlines, or we can hand over our weights to the strongest of all and let the banner of our life be His love. 

Humbling myself is not a habit, and it goes against everything culture advises, but I choose to live out the fulfilling purpose of bringing glory to His name. I'm giving up the authorship of my accomplishments. I'm giving up my days of endless acting and I'm accepting the role some call “needy” because His strength will always be more than mine on my bad days and my best days.

"That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong" (2 Cor. 12:10).

Starting today, I will be a strong woman—not by striving, but by surrendering.