Facing Spiritual Exhaustion

“You will come to the grave in full vigor, like sheaves gathered in season.” (Job 5:26)

Have you ever had a time in your life when you were so spiritually fatigued you couldn’t face what the day would bring? I have – like today. Then I go to the Deep Place where nobody goes.  He who has already visited all my tomorrows knows what today will bring forth. He is not beaten down – not bowed over, bent low like a sheaf of grain in a wind storm.  Not like me.

“How do I ‘do today,’ Lord?  It’s too long, too hard.”

“Life won’t go on without you?”

“No.  But I can’t do today!  Pain takes my breath.  The things that matter most to me are crumbling. “Help!”

“I am here. Come” --  

“I can’t ‘do today.’”

“I can!”

“I’m not God – that’s the problem.”

“I Am.”

“I believe! But dear Lord, I can’t do today – even half a day.”

“Do this minute.”

“I don’t think…”

“Yes you can, you can do the next minute.  Try, count the seconds:  One, two, three – 

Silence

“Now the next one.  I have counted out your moments and your days for you already.  Now you do it.”

“But that first minute lasted so long!”

“This time stop counting and read a verse of Scripture:  fill the next minute thinking about Me.”

Then I read Job 5:26: “You will come to the grave in full vigor, like sheaves gathered in season.”

“Lord, I feel beaten down like a sheaf in a wind storm.”

“Here comes the sun!  You and I will ‘do today’ together.”

Silence

I put my hand into His, and counting hard, “did today.”  “Lord of all my yesterdays and tomorrows:  help me to ‘do' today,’” I asked Him.  “My sheaf bends in the wind.”

“Till I gather you into my barn you must bend in the winds that come:  for you must stand in the harvest field until it is your season.  It will not blow so hard today.  In the respite wait patiently. Rest in Me.  One day, ‘today’ as I intended it, will come to be.”

Then I began to climb the steps to the shallow place where everyone lives and found “today” happening.  I counted every other step and tried to think of a promise.  On the alternate step I said loudly, “I believe!”  And when I just couldn’t’ take another step I breathed, “Help thou mine unbelief!”

"But those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength.  They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint." ~ Isaiah 40:31

Lord, sometimes I am exhausted, spiritually fatigued, with no more strength to cope. However hard the wind blows, give me the spiritual vigor I need to serve you today. Amen.