I struggled when our children were growing up. Somewhere, Arlie and I picked up the idea the we had to have family devotions at a certain time each day (at the dinner table) and for a certain length of time.
But we found it wasn't always practical, or even wise, to live up to an idea. There were nights when Little League practice, a school play, something at church, or a dozen other things crowded our family devotions and even crowded them out. We sensed that at times it actually would have been counter productive to go ahead with our idea. And we didn't want to risk turning our children off to the whole idea.
I believe our children love the Word of God today because we made our occasional visits in the Word times of delight. We tried lots of approaches. Sometime they worked; sometimes they bombed. When they bombed, we admitted it and waited for a better time. Devotions at our house became "irregularly" regular times of delight rather than oppressively regular times of drudgery.
It may help you to know that all of our children are grown now, and the fruit is on the tree. They are all Christians, have married Christians, and are raising their children in Christian homes. My son and I have co-authored about twenty Christian books for children.
I've thought a lot about what worked and what didn't in this area of spiritual leadership in my home, and I've gleaned the following principles:
- Love for the Lord flows naturally from love for His Word.
- A consistent time for family devotions is great, as long as guilt and routine stay in the background.
- If you don't give up, you can find a format that works.
- If you ask Him, God will give you abundant grace and wisdom to be good parents and spiritual leaders.
So how do we apply these principles? With all my heart I believe the first step in leading our children to Christ, and to a lifetime of walking with Him, is not force-feeding Bible knowledge. Rather, it is helping them to love God's Word, to see it as a user-friendly reflection of the Living Word; our Lord Jesus. Jeremiah 15:16 says, "When your words came, I ate them, they were my joy and my heart's delight."
How can we help our children "consume" God's Word so that it becomes their heart's delight? Here are some suggestions:
1. Speak with a positive attitude.
Try not to say things like: "You will not get out of that chair until we are through"; "Be quiet and listen!"; or "One more giggle out of you and you'll go to your room!" Reinforce the positive attitude by saying things like: "Guess which wonderful person we're going to meet in the Bible tonight!"; "Let's have a contest to see who can..."; or "I'm so excited about the Bible passage we're going to read!"
2. Keep devotions on the bright side.
Where did we ever get the idea that holiness is somber and gloomy? Encourage a few giggles; don't squelch them. Let a child interrupt with something funny she heard that day. Make up a game to guess Bible facts. How about having cake and ice cream with devotions?
3. Link learning about the Bible with building your child's self-esteem.
"Kathy! What a wonderful thought!"; "Ron, you're a brave, young man like Joshua was."; or "Jan, you are my little helper, just like Dorcas."
4. Use a Bible or Bible book geared to your child's level.
When I couldn't find what I wanted, I wrote three age-graded Bibles for our children: The Toddler's Bible; The Early Readers Bible; and Journey Through the Bible. You can find these resources and many more at Christian Book Distributors.
5. Ask yourself if you've delighted in the Word today.
If you haven't, read Psalm 119 and recapture some of your passion for God's Word. Most likely, your children's attitude will reflect your own.
Above all, keep in mind the ultimate purpose of family devotions; to help your children know the Lord, love Him, and walk in His ways. When your grown children make devotions with their own children a priority, you'll be glad for every moment you spent with them in the delights of His Word.
