This article contains content related to mental health struggles. If you or someone you know is in crisis, please call or text the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline at 988, or visit 988lifeline.org. Help is free, confidential, and available 24/7.
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Years ago, I was suddenly thrust into a family mental health crisis I never saw coming—one I couldn’t have imagined even in my worst nightmares. It came without warning, and I was completely unprepared for how to navigate it. I had no previous exposure to the kinds of mental health challenges we were facing, and nothing I had read over the years even came close to addressing the reality we were living through. Everything I learned—out of sheer necessity—came through self-education, trial and error, and seeking out the help of professionals.
Along the way, I was shocked to discover just how broken our mental health system is and how limited the resources are—not only for the one suffering, but also for their family. That’s why it’s so important to be your own advocate. Thankfully, the internet became an invaluable tool. I found much of my most helpful information and networking there.
It is my hope that some of what I’ve learned through our family's journey will help guide and encourage you if you're walking a similar path. Please remember this: you are not alone!
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HELP WITH NAVIGATING A MENTAL HEALTH CRISIS
Create a resource binder or notebook. Keep all essential documents, contacts, and notes in one place, so you can readily grab it when you need it.
Build your crisis support team (psychiatrist, counselor, medical doctor, crisis lines, pharmacist, etc.).
Include all these numbers on a one-page list in the front of your notebook:
- Police Department (have a list of family car license plates)
- Emergency Contacts (nearest hospital and/or mental health facility)
- Crisis Lines (24-hour and suicide hotline: Call or Text 988)
- Psychiatrist/Counselor/Doctors you are working with
- Pharmacy Contact and full medication list with dosages, refills, etc.
- Trusted friends, family members, and babysitters
- Medical Records (have those already gathered)
- Legal Medical Documents (co-signed for current and future treatment)
Keep a journal. Track daily symptoms, behaviors, side effects, dosages, meds—anything that will be helpful when talking to professionals—and date it. Include this as a section in your binder/notebook. This will also alert you to red flags, unhealthy behavioral patterns, setbacks, etc.
Find a skilled professional mental health team (counselor/therapist/psychiatrist). They need to be available for your loved one, and skilled in your loved one’s mental health needs, and very knowledgeable with psychiatric meds. You need a team who is willing to take the time you need and is available in times of crisis. All these questions can be asked in the search process. (Note: a psychologist cannot prescribe medications, only a psychiatrist or psychiatric nurse can, so you want to make sure you find the right professional for prescriptions.)
Prepare thorough questions for every medical visit. You need to go into the appointments prepared with a list of important questions and concerns you have to maximize your loved one’s visit. Don’t rely on your memory. Summarize visits later once you’ve been able to digest everything.
Privately brief the provider ahead of appointments. If possible, speak to health care providers ahead of time to ensure that they have the full picture of what is happening, especially so as not to upset your loved one during the appointment. (Many times, the patient themself is unable to accurately explain what’s going on. Partial facts can only prolong necessary and speedy treatment if the counselor/psychiatrist doesn’t understand the seriousness of the situation.)
Work with professionals to create a preventative plan. Do this when things are stable. What do you do in case of an emergency? Who do you call on weekends, after hours? Where do you go? What legal documentation do you need? What if the person is suicidal? Ask professionals what is the best and fastest way to get in touch.
Ask how to be watching for red flags. Accept that there will be setbacks. (Most people who have had a major mental health episode will likely have another one.) By being prepared and knowing what to expect, it can be less traumatic for all involved, although it is still very challenging.
Find a 24/hour crisis line you can trust. Keep the number(s) on your fridge or on your phone contact list. Try to anticipate stressors ahead of time, preparing for them the best you can.
Take suicidal talk seriously. If your loved one is suicidal, start by asking gentle questions. Do you feel hopeless? Do you feel like you want to harm yourself? Do you have a plan? If you feel your loved one is in danger of harming themselves, get help from a trained professional as quickly as possible. Call 911 or the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline at 988 or your local emergency number immediately and stay with the person until you can get help. You can also take the person to the nearest emergency room if the person is willing. If not willing, call the police as a last resort. (Police are not the most equipped for mental health crises.)
Network with as many people and professionals as you can. Press professionals regularly and stay in their face, especially when you are in crisis mode. (I know this is very hard.)
Become the expert on your loved ones’ diagnosis. By doing so, you will feel less helpless. Knowledge is power. Learning the symptoms, treatment options, and common medications and side effects will give you confidence as you navigate the day-to-day management of your loved one’s illness.
Use NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness) resources. This is an excellent organization with all kinds of educational, individual, and family resources. They also provide support groups for family members and the person struggling with mental illness. You can find out where the local chapter is in your area on their site and get personal help. (Go to Nami.org.)
Focus on treatment before diagnosis. In a crisis, immediate care is more important than figuring out the ins and out of the specific mental illness. There will be time for that later.
Seek out counseling/support for yourself. This is too big to navigate alone. Mental health issues affect everyone, especially the caregiver! At the time of crises, I went in weekly—sometimes two or three times a week—just to cope and find out what to do for my own emotional stability.
Take breaks from the stress. Do something with friends, go out to eat, see a movie, go for a walk. Try to regain some sense of normalcy.
Give yourself permission to grieve. The grief will hit at the most unexpected moments. Have a good cry often; it will give you a necessary emotional release.
Understand that healing takes time. The brain will need time to mend and heal after a major psychotic or depressive episode. (I found, for my loved ones, it was a good year.) While this can sound discouraging, it helps to be able to prepare yourself emotionally for the slow nature of healing from many mental health episodes. This is a marathon, not a sprint.
Talk with your family. Sit family members down to explain what is happening. Touch base with each other regularly to process fragile emotions and fears. Being around a person struggling with mental illness can be scary for everyone. Especially, it is important to emphasize that the behaviors of the loved one are the result of the illness; it is not reflective of the person they love. It’s important to separate the two, especially for children and teenagers.
Hold plans loosely. A mental health crisis can change things at any moment. Stay flexible and open-handed with plans and expectations.
Celebrate small victories and improvements along the way. A peaceful day, a completed therapy session—every step forward matters. Point these out to the entire family; everyone needs to see hopeful improvement.
Ask for prayer and practical help. Assemble a practical support system for yourself (friends and family members—people you can trust and talk to freely). Let others care for you during this emotionally exhausting time. You will need it. (People brought meals, sent cards, took me out for a break, made Christmas cookies, checked in regularly, prayed, etc.)
Hang on to hope and trust God’s nearness. He will hold you up when you feel like you can’t take another step. “Have no fear of sudden disaster…for the LORD will be your confidence” (Prov. 3:25-26).
Walking through a mental health crisis with someone you love is one of the hardest things you may ever face—but you don’t have to face it alone. While the road can feel overwhelming and uncertain, there are steps you can take to find stability, clarity, and hope. Be gentle with yourself, stay connected to others, and lean on your support system—spiritual, professional, and relational—that can help you through. God promises to be near to the brokenhearted and to give wisdom to those who ask (Jas. 1:5). Even in the chaos, His presence is constant. Cling to that promise, take one step at a time, and trust that healing is possible—for your loved one, and for you.
📥 BONUS: Download the Mental Health Crisis Guide
Need a practical next step? This printable guide summarizes Shelly’s tips in an easy-to-use checklist—plus includes a curated directory of U.S. and international suicide prevention and mental health hotlines, as well as Christian counseling resources.
Includes:
- A printable crisis response checklist
- Suicide prevention and mental health hotlines (U.S. + international)
- Faith-based counseling and caregiver support resources
For Further Study:
📖 Read:
💭 Reflect:
- What support systems do I already have in place—and where do I need to strengthen them?
- Have I been afraid to ask for help or admit that I’m struggling?
- Who might God be calling me to help prepare, encourage, or support in a time of crisis?
🙏 Pray:
Father, You are my refuge in times of trouble. When everything feels uncertain, steady my heart and help me take the next step. Teach me how to care for others with wisdom, and to trust You with what I can’t control. Amen.
