It is an icy January afternoon—way too cold for a sane person to take a walk outside. But I’m almost finished listening to a Christian audio book, a recording of That Hideous Strength by C.S. Lewis, and I won’t let myself listen to it indoors. When I clicked off yesterday, evil scientists had imprisoned Mark, the main character. Today he must make a choice. He must either participate in their nasty plans or die.
I look out the window and sigh. It might be cold, but I have to find out what happens. I lace up my walking shoes, turn on the audio book and head out the door.
Normally, the last thing I’d want to do is walk in winter weather, but today, I’m guided by sheer desperation. I’m a woman in the middle of a thriller.
In the past, I didn’t like anything to do with exercise. I’m naturally good at things that involve a love of sitting. I like reading, writing and libraries. Our house overflows with books and magazines. It was a book, in fact, that led me back to Christianity from where I’d abandoned it as a child. After that, books from Christian authors formed a second kind of congregation for me. Their words leaped out from the page to correct or encourage me in all of the changes God swept into my life: new perspectives, new habits and a new way to see the world.
One new perspective was my health. At 37, my own lack of fitness had begun to alarm even me. Twenty years of smoking cigarettes and sitting on the couch made the slightest exertion difficult. I quit smoking but found that getting out of the car made me breathe hard. I had trouble climbing the stairs in our house.
I knew that I needed exercise, but every sport seemed either too hard or too boring. I couldn’t run long enough to play tennis. I was bored when I tried to lift weights. I flailed around helplessly in an aerobics class. Was there a sport for someone who was really out of shape? Was there an exercise for someone who’d rather be reading? Finally, I prayed about it. God, this is hopeless, I told Him.
One day I pulled up to the house and sat for a few minutes in the parked car, listening to an audio book of Pride and Prejudice. I didn’t want to turn off the tape—but didn’t want to spend the rest of the afternoon in the driveway, either.
I remembered watching my brother put on headphones before he jogged down the beach. I couldn’t jog, but I could walk. I dug out a portable cassette player, popped in the tape and tried going around the block with it. I listened to Mr. Darcy snub Elizabeth Bennett at a ball. Poor Elizabeth! I thought, heaving myself up a hill. She’s too poor to ever marry! I headed down another side street, forgetting that I was hot or that my legs were tired. And before Elizabeth had time to snub Mr. Darcy back, I had walked two and a half miles.
Now audio books motivate me to get out the door on my daily walk. It’s not that I’m devoted to exercise. I want to find out who the murderer is.
Over the years, I’ve listened to scores of books. Gradually, my energy level has increased, and my body has grown stronger. One day I discovered that even an exercise class is easy for me now. After the class, I sat for a few minutes in the car, astonished. Since when could I keep up with an exercise class? How did I, the person who dreaded workouts, ever get to be in reasonable shape? God gives us some miracles immediately; others can only be seen when we look back, after we’ve gone a few hundred miles.
Of course, I look a little odd when I’m listening to audio books. It’s not the phone attached to my jeans or the earphones around my head. It’s because I forget that I’m in public while I’m listening to a book. I shake my head. I talk back to the characters. I find myself oblivious to the neighbor trimming her hedges with a pair of shears. “Don’t marry him,” I’ll say as I go by. “He doesn’t love you!” My neighbor smiles at me graciously, but she doesn’t put down her hedge clippers either.
I listen to mysteries, classics, biographies and sermons, but the books I love the most are the audios of Christian fiction. To me, these books feed both mind and soul, bringing the essential truths of Christianity to mind.
I started listening to these books to distract me while I tried to get in shape. But when I’ve finished the exercise, my mind feels as refreshed as my body. I put on the earphones and listen, and the Holy Spirit gently underlines what he wants me to hear. The fiction floods my brain and feeds it with images, rejuvenating a part of me that needs myth and story.
The plots work like parables. When the characters pray, I remember to pray, too. They talk to God about their troubles, and I talk to Him, too. The characters remind me of something I tend to forget in the confusion of everyday life: no matter what problems I am walking with that day, God can be trusted to handle them all.
I listened to The Lord of the Rings in early spring, exercising in a chill landscape of cream-colored fields and bare trees. I scuffed along the road, disheartened. I was struggling to speak more honestly with those around me. Was it worth it? Did God even want me to be more real with other people? I turned on the audio book. A few minutes later, I heard Gandolph’s speech to Frodo. “All that is gold does not glitter,” he says. “Not all who wander are lost.” His words seemed like an answer from God, and I smiled down at the road. Sometimes what is gold—what God wants us to do—does not even seem attractive to us humans. Sometimes what is gold can only be seen through the eyes of God.
That summer I checked out Cry, the Beloved Country, and I walked the dusty roads near our house. We had decided to move –a wrenching decision – and the landscape looked as unhappy as I felt. The fields browned from lack of water, and the dirt road cracked under my feet. But as I listened to the main character, Pastor Stephen Kumalo, reach for God in his loss, I was comforted. God is powerful, the author seems to say. He turns our pain into new life.
In the fall, I heard Father Tim face problems in At Home in Mitford. Father Tim prays about each situation, allowing God to touch His world. I listened to the book, kicking faded red leaves out of the street gutter as I walked. It reminded me of a problem in our own house. One of our relatives searched daily, fruitlessly for a job. As time wore on, our sympathy for him had increased, but had our prayers increased, too? This book reminded me that I needed to offer the only real help that I could – to ask God for help. I turned off the recording of Father Tim’s prayers and prayed, too.
As the seasons change, so do my problems, but God’s answer remains constant: God loves us. He cares for us. He wants us to go to Him for help.
And sometimes, I’m reminded, our difficulties allow us to grow closer to God. In one of the greatest scenes ever written by C. S. Lewis, the malevolent forces in That Hideous Strength strip Mark of the false gods in his life – his career, his reputation and his colleagues. But losing everything allows Mark the freedom to surrender to God. The writing whispers in my ear as I walk under a landscape of icy branches and pale sky. Trust God in all difficulty, C. S. Lewis seems to say. The darkest places allow us to see more of His light.
The characters transform during the course of each book, and I’ve changed a little bit, too. In place of my ruined body, God has given me strength and health. I breathe a little deeper, move a little easier and step a little lighter since I’ve started walking. My spirit feels lighter, too. By walking with Christian audio books, I’ve found a closer walk with God.
Interested in walking with a good book? Here are some suggestions to get you started:
Till We Have Faces by C. S. Lewis. Based on a Greek myth, this book shows the difference between our version of love—and God’s.
The Great Divorce by C. S. LewisLewis’s vision of heaven and hell. Chapter 11 is one of the best things ever written for anyone struggling against old habits.
The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe by C.S. LewisOne of the first books in the Narnia Chronicles, a series written for children. It also functions as an adult allegory, with the character of Aslan representing Christ. The series will give you a greater vision of Jesus: His character, His destiny and His relationship with us.
The Hiding Place by Corrie ten Boom, with John and Elizabeth Sherrill. Christian sisters hide Jews from the Nazis and end up in a concentration camp themselves—right where they are needed. A true story.
Cry, the Beloved Country by Alan Paton (Books on Tape, Inc., 1948, 1982). This book makes you more aware of how God works through prayer, to heal the lives of people and the suffering of countries.
The Lord of the Rings by J. R. R. Tolkien. In 1981 the UK radio station BBC Radio broadcast a well-written, well-acted dramatization of J. R. R. Tolkien’s three books. Listening helps you understand the cost of sacrifice. Total length: 13 hours.
~ By Nancy Slack
