“After a little while, those standing there went up to Peter and said, ‘Surely you are one of them; your accent gives you away.’ Then he began to call down curses, and he swore to them, ‘I don’t know the man!’ Immediately a rooster crowed. Then Peter remembered the word Jesus had spoken: ‘Before the rooster crows, you will disown me three times.’ And he went outside and wept bitterly.” ~ Matthew 26:73-75
Have you ever heard the rooster crow? I have! There have been many times in my life that I, like Peter, have stood tall and straight, looking someone squarely in the eye, and said with honest, sincere earnestness, “I am ready!” I felt I was adequate for a given situation, gifted for a special task, prepared for a particular assignment. I have known what it was to be eager, excited, dedicated, and sure of myself, only to hear the rooster crow! I believed I was ready for marriage until the wedding, for motherhood before the baby came, and for church membership before I was given my first responsibility in the fellowship. How can one be so sure about one’s capabilities and then fail so miserably? What a dull, sickening realization it is when you discover you were not ready after all and that you’ve undoubtedly fallen far short of the target.
I suppose failure tastes especially bitter immediately following our most confident assertions. I remember as a young teenager feeling completely sure I was about to beat a tennis opponent in a tournament. “I’m ready,” I crowed to myself! But something happened to my thirteen-year-old confidence as soon as I stepped onto that lonely court. I heard the rooster crow in no uncertain terms and lost the most humiliating game of my life!
I have thought of other times, too, that I have crowed to myself or others concerning some clever assessment of my abilities. I well remember one unforgettable occasion when I was sitting on a platform about to speak to a group of women. I had traveled a long way to give my message. "I am ready, Lord," I intoned in pious yet sincere and earnest prayer. The program began. It continued, and continued, and continued, and quite soon I found myself concluding that it seemed to have no end in sight! Did we really need to know the whereabouts of the restrooms, what color the doors were, and how many? Was it the best use of our time to review the entire program point by point when it was laid out in total clarity in black and white before our very eyes? Then the seminar leaders began to give their previews of the talks they would be giving. They presented them in such detail it seemed redundant to go to their sessions after they had finished. "I am ready, Lord," I kept reminding Him. "Please hurry them up because they are taking up all my time!" Did I hear a cock crow faintly in the distance?
The Lord Jesus looked right past my voluminous Bible and stack of lecture notes and knew I was no more ready than Simon Peter who had said to Him on that auspicious occasion, "Lord, I am ready to go with you both to prison and to death.” “Before this night is over, Peter,” Jesus said to him, "you will disown me three times.” Before my night was over I was to know the humiliating experience of being faced with the fact I was far from ready to deliver all those clever words assembled in the shape of a sermon. Jesus was about to teach me that my well prepared soul mattered far more to Him than my well-prepared message! In other words, my attitude was disappointingly wrong. I was proud and arrogant and needed reducing to size, which the Lord proceeded to do.
With pride and arrogance, one takes that which rightly belongs to God and applies it to oneself. Pride says I am worth something apart from God. As Peter acted, saying in effect, "I am ready to suffer and I expect to do it all on my own; watch me. Peter, confident of his ability to do the right and brave thing, stuck his neck out and fell flat on his face. That night as I was sitting on that stage in front of all those ladies and saying in effect, "I am worth something apart from God," the Lord decided to teach me a valuable lesson. He was about to show me I was only worth something because of Him, not apart from Him. My fellow participants were worth a great deal as well! Oh, how I identified with Peter standing proudly in front of Jesus and the other disciples casting a scathing look in their direction and saying with a certain degree of scorn, "Though ALL men forsake thee, YET NOT I!" The all men he was referring to were very obviously the eleven other disciples whom Peter had ceased to respect after having heard Jesus give grave warning of the fact that they would all soon forsake Him. Peter could very readily believe the other followers of Jesus could and probably would let Him down, but he could not conceive of the possibility of doing that dreadful thing himself. The night at that ladies' meeting, the Lord showed me that my proud heart was guilty of a denial as dreadful as Peter's. I was denying the worth of my fellow believers and was trusting not in the Lord, but in the adequacy of my own resources.
"You need to tell these people about your attitude," Jesus said to me as I sat on that stage perched ever so properly in my speaker's chair. "You must ask them for their forgiveness."
"All right, I'll send them a note," I muttered beginning to search around for a piece of paper!
"Oh, no you don't," He said, "tell them." "How can I tell them?" I asked somewhat desperately as I arranged my features in the right religious look and smiled sweetly at the soloist (who was singing a song which appeared to have at least twenty verses).
"Publicly, Peter denied me," He replied, "publicly, he confessed it!"
Suddenly I found myself hoping against hope the soloist would sing at least another twenty stanzas. I thought of the meeting on the lakeside after the crucifixion and resurrection of our Lord, and I remembered Peter's conversation with Jesus in front of the same group of men that he had been so quick to dismiss as inferior and weak. That morning, the acrid smell of the charcoal fire must have been a poignant and terrible reminder of another charcoal fire in Pilate's courtyard, and of Peter's abject failure to be the disciple he had believed himself to be! Could it be only such a very few days since he had bragged so dangerously in front of them all, “I’ll never, never forsake thee?" "When they had finished eating," scripture tells us, "Jesus said to Simon Peter, 'Simon, son of John, do you love me, more than these?’ ‘Yes, Lord,’ he said, 'You know that I love you.' Jesus said, 'Feed my lambs' " (John 21:15).
Failure isn't final, Jesus was saying to Peter; "I still have a task for you to do." But failure must be faced realistically. When Jesus asked Peter if he "loved Him," He used the Greek word agape which means to love as God loves. God is primarily concerned with the other's well-being and is prepared to put the other first, regardless of the cost to Himself. Agape loves selflessly and is dedicated to a sacrificial giving of itself at all times. When Peter had told his Lord and Savior he would die for Him, he had fully believed he was capable of agape. But then the rooster crowed. Peter didn't follow his Lord to prison or to death as he had promised but, instead, followed "afar off," far enough off to avoid the identification with Jesus of Nazareth that might bring him into disgrace or danger. Remembering all of that, Peter answered Jesus' post-resurrection question as to whether he "loved" Him or not with a quiet confession of his failure. “Yes, Lord, You know that I love you”. He replied using the Greek word for human love, phileo. Phileo means simply to "be fond of" and speaks of the love as between friends. Peter had at last come to terms with himself.
Thinking about those words and Peter's confession, I knew what I needed to do. I needed to tell those dear ladies I had heard the rooster crow. I knew that before I could ever get up in front of that waiting assembly and teach the Word of God to others, I had to obey it myself! Do you know how hard that was for me? Here I was, a popular Bible teacher and speaker; how would everyone feel about me if I got up and made such a fool of myself? Who was going to listen to me after that? I may as well not have taken all the effort to come if I were to do such a crazy thing. And surely the Lord didn't want all my precious time and trouble to go to waste! In the end, I did it anyway. I did it because I had no alternative. You see, I knew He was giving me another chance. He always does, you know, because failure isn't final! I thanked the Lord I had learned a marvelously valuable lesson and sitting there, bowed my head in prayer and asked Him to make me ready for something I knew I wasn't ready for at all; namely, the opportunity to humble myself, admit my faults, and seek forgiveness from those I'd wronged. I'm sure the ladies thought I was deep in prayer concerning the message rather than a desperate plea for help concerning the chastened messenger!
It had been necessary for me to learn that an acknowledgment of my own inadequacy was a very necessary ingredient for a servant of His, and I had needed to be forcibly reminded that it would take the adequacy of God to achieve it! When you think you are ready for everything and you discover you are not prepared for anything that is the start of a new day! But listen to Jesus and hear what He said to Peter. "Feed my sheep, feed my lambs," He said. "Go on, you can now," He was saying to Peter, "Failure isn't final, and now you are ready!" The cock will crow, to be sure, but it will herald the beginning of a new day for us, too, for Jesus never allows a chastened disciple to lie fallow forever. There's too much work to be done!
Rising from my seat at last; I glanced at the clock. To my surprise, the program was running on time. These dear people had not intruded on my portion at all. It had all been in my mind. It was a matter of my spirit, that was all, and my impatience with them had merely been a symptom of my arrogance which was having a hard time being upstaged by anyone. I sighed. Leaving my carefully prepared notes on the floor, I turned to the woman sitting expectantly behind me awaiting the address. "Before I can say anything to you, sweet ladies," I started hesitantly addressing the audience, "I have something to say to some other sweet ladies; the ones who have seen fit to invite me to enjoy the privilege of sharing the ministry with them." I turned to each and with the sound of the crowing of that rooster ringing in my ears, I said to them, "I'm so sorry; please forgive me for being angry and irritated with you all, for I felt you were taking my time and I want you to know God has soundly rebuked me! I felt I was ready to preach to others but now I know I came onto this platform in my own strength and I recognize I was not ready at all." They forgave me, of course. They didn't have my problem! "Now you can feed my sheep," said Jesus, "go on! Hungry sheep are primarily concerned with a good meal; they don't really mind who serves it to them. Even failures can lead them to the green pastures!"
So, what do you do when you hear the rooster crow? If you are like the rest of us, and like Simon Peter himself, you will begin by crying bitterly! But let me encourage you not to cry forever. Wipe your eyes, for the Lord still has need of you! Someone has been praying for you all this time. Before we ever fail, the God who sees around the corner of tomorrow and knows the whole bitter tragic story has made provision. He has started praying for you days, months, perhaps even years before you ever denied your Lord. Jesus said, “... Simon, Simon, behold, Satan hath desired to have you, that he may sift you as wheat. But I HAVE PRAYED FOR THEE, that thy faith fail not: and when thou art converted, strengthen thy brethren” (Luke 22:31, 32, KJV).
Satan is very uncreative. He hasn't changed his devices one bit since his days in the Garden of Eden when he tempted Eve to believe she was ready to do it alone and do without God. Jesus warned Peter that Satan was after him and through Peter he also warned all of us. The devil will laugh all the way back to hell whenever he can get us to puff out our chests and trust in ourselves. It takes Jesus' prayers being answered to make the difference. It always gives me a great thrill whenever I think of Jesus praying for me because I know His prayers are answered! When I read what He asks for, I am touched beyond measure. He prays that when the testing times come our faith will not fail. What does that mean? Faith means trust. It means leaning hard and heavy upon the Lord, acknowledging our own inadequacy and recognizing our dependence on Him. When my faith fails, or I cease to lean on Him, I start to lean on and trust in myself; then I begin to believe I am indeed ready for anything with or without God! So listen, all you failures out there; and hearken, you readers who are identifying with this: after the rooster has crowed and you have repented, you will surely hear the Lord giving new orders. Listen to them!
“When thou art converted, (turned around again), strengthen thy brethren”. There is work to be done. He will encourage you to share your shortcomings with the people you lead because they will need to know that you are simply an ordinary disciple who is learning to fail successfully, and to realize that failure is never final.
