When asked what I do, sometimes I say, “Juggle.” This draws quizzical looks. You,too, might wonder…what I juggle. Balls. Lots of them. In assorted sizes and of varied worth. For years, I tried to keep all of them soaring in the air 24/7. Sounds exhausting, right?
As a Jesus-loving gal, wife, mom, daughter, executive, friend, neighbor, Bible study student, author, speaker, lunch-maker, clothes-washer, etc., I’ve spent decades practicing my act. Can you relate? Daily we toss many balls—usually too many—into the air.
Our juggling routine didn’t happen overnight. We may have started by learning to juggle a career and a spouse. Maybe we went back to school or took on a volunteer project. Over time, we may have added one or more children. Then all of their activities. There is our faith, our home, our friends, our sanity. There is no end to the number of balls we try to keep in the air. The effort required to keep them all moving is exhausting. We may feel that if even one ball drops, we will be thrown off balance and our whole act will come crashing down. No!
Let go of that notion. We will achieve a balanced life only if we accept that some balls can and should drop, at least for a season. It’s much easier to see if we know our priorities. C. S. Lewis said, “Put first things first and we get second things thrown in: put second things first and we lose both first and second things.”
Let’s assume we juggle five categories of balls and our goal is to set our priorities according to the value each ball represents in our lives.
1. Crystal Balls
Crystal balls are the most important and valuable balls in our repertoire. If one drops, it shatters, and it will require an immense effort, as well as heartache, to try to piece it back together. We need to protect these balls fiercely. My faith, family, and closest friends are my crystal balls. God has shown us the key to juggling in His Word. It’s found in Matt. 6:33, “But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.” Putting Him as our top priority makes juggling a lot easier—and a whole lot more fulfilling.
2. Glass Balls
Glass balls are of great importance, but they’re a step below crystal balls. They shatter and break if dropped, but are generally replaceable or repairable with time and effort. My glass balls often include my career and volunteering. I do my best to keep them soaring.
3. Rubber Balls
Rubber balls are the things we manage on a routine basis, but in the grand scheme of things, they don’t matter as much as we think. If we drop one, it bounces right back to us—with little or no effort. A spotless home is a rubber ball. Throwing the perfect dinner party or the best three-year-old birthday party ever, complete with a homemade cake and Pinterest-worthy decorations, are examples of rubber balls.
Rubber balls are things we want or need to do, but sometimes we need to ease up on the stress-inducing expectations of making everything perfect. These balls can become significant time-consumers if we aren’t careful. Remember, rubber balls bounce back and they won’t break when they drop.
4. Plastic Balls
Plastic balls are not at the top of our priority lists. Fitness and healthy-eating fell into this category for me for years. As an empty-nester with a little more time, they’re more important. Healthy meals and 30 minutes of exercise are part of my daily routine. In years past, if those balls dropped for a time, no lasting havoc ensued. In fact, I find that when I drop a plastic ball it sits there…waiting for the time when I can pick it up and put it back into my routine.
There was a time, after we adopted our son, when I knew that what I needed to do was care for him and his needs, and my career became a plastic ball for that season. Many said I’d never be able to pick my career back up if I did such a thing. But through prayer, I knew that’s what I needed to do. Guess what? My career is back—as a glass ball. As Phil. 4:13 says, “I can do all this through Him who gives me strength.”
5. Lead Balls
Lead balls are balls we need to drop and never pick up again. You may think you aren’t trying to juggle lead balls, but please think again. For working women, false guilt and worry are almost always at the top of this list. Sometimes guilt is justified, but I’m talking about the false guilt that comes with second-guessing yourself. Think: feeling guilty because you need (or want to) work outside the home so you missed your child’s first grade play because you were at work. Or feeling guilty because someone politely accused you of one-upping the other ladies because you made all the centerpieces for the mother/daughter banquet—even though your intent was not to impress but to employ a talent you enjoy. False guilt is guilt we allow someone to place on us—or we place on ourselves, as opposed to guilt that comes from doing something wrong. We know the difference. Would we consider a friend guilty of the offense for which we blame ourselves?
Other lead balls include caring too much about what others think or saying “yes” too often. We say “yes” so we don’t feel guilty, when we need to recognize that saying “no” opens doors for us to say “yes” to our crystal and glass balls. Draining relationships are lead balls; just as we have friends who refresh us, there are others who drain us.
Our crystal balls should remain crystal because they are the foundation of who we are. Other balls may fluctuate with the seasons of our lives. For instance, volunteering has become a glass ball for me; when I was busy raising children, it was plastic or rubber. My career has gone from crystal to plastic to glass.
Ecclesiastes 3:1 says, “There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens…” Life isn’t all neatly labeled, but it’s a little easier to juggle when we figure out the true worth of what we’re juggling.
Excerpts were taken from Remember Who YOU Are by Paula Brown Stafford and Lisa T. Grimes. Used with permission.